Tuesday, December 1, 2009

If I did use the F-word......

I'm not one to use the F-word, but if I were, it would probably be used in conjunction with my disdain for The Chipmunks.    If you do hear me slip, don't feel the need to point out the inconsistencies between my faith and mouth.   I am fully aware of these things and can admit my shortcomings, mostly because of my understanding that I'm internally flawed to begin with.  At least that's my excuse.   I digress.

My parents will gladly point out that I did like The Chipmunks at a much younger point in my life and how I probably laughed at their cute little voices to no end.   I think the more recent disdain has taken an influx because of the tendency of Hollywood to put a modern tilt on an already irritating idea.  Specifically, The Chipmunks have gone hip hop and as you can see on the poster for The Chipmunks movie, they are "keeping it real" as opposed to just singing Christmas songs.     

This is both an insult to the hip hop industry as well as chipmunks as a rodent.   I suppose this is an insult to Entourage as well (referring to the slogan), but I've never actually seen that show to make a comparison.  I don't find Jeremy Piven's voice nearly as shrill as Theodore's if that counts for anything.   I used to love looking at chipmunks in New Mexico, but now my mind is plagued by high voices when I see one scurrying around.    Anyway, this poster is just flat out dumb and unfortunately the poster for The Chipmunks 2, The Squeakqual carries on the flame of retardedness.   


This time Alvin has his hat turned sideways to show his rebellious streak.  Instead of Theodore giving the peace sign with his fingers, it is now Simon.    Also, Simon is back to wearing his thick, nerdy glasses, which makes me wonder if his sunglasses in the first poster were prescription lenses.  Doubtful, but I do wonder.  That being said, I can't imagine ruining Christmas day by sitting through this film.

Now the movie business taking an idea from bad to worse isn't new.    Here are just a few examples:

1) a digital Garfield
2) George Lucas went from a digital Jabba the Hutt to Jar Jar Binks in a few short years
3) Toy Story 2 and 3 (also all digital)

While all of those are awful in their own right, I find this particular character transformation (which looks to be hand drawn) taking my disgust to a new level.

Lord, help us all.

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